It is a well-known fact to those who know it well that your desires and fantasies make you miserable.
If that first sentence doesn’t stop you in your tracks and say “Hold up Snowy, I come to you for some ideas, advice, some motivation or inspiration… What is this ####???”
Fear not dear reader what follows will allow you to chase your dreams and be deliriously happy at the same time.
So if you are a goal chaser a dream maker a pursuer of the vision prepare to have your mind blown…
A Quick Thought Experiment.
I want you to imagine standing on a beach looking out towards the horizon. Then I want you to ask yourself this question… “Why haven’t you ever reached the horizon?” Answer: Because when you get there it moves off into the distance to create a new one. (The horizon is just a trick our brain plays on us to deal with geography).
It is the same with goals, dreams and visions you get what you want and then they move.
Why do you think many people who get what they dreamed of are miserable? It was either not what they expected or their dreams shifted.
Crikey Snowy you really are depressing me!!! Throw me a bone man for goodness sake!
OK so here is the bone and Here is how you win the game.
First, we have to realise that our goals dreams, visions and fantasies are just like the horizon but instead of geography, this is how our brain deals with time!
Please take a moment to get the implications of that sentence.
Second, we have to look at three points.
1. Our fantasy life (or if you prefer, your compelling goals) We will call this Fantasy 1 (F1 for short)
2. Where we are right now! We will call this Reality 1 (R1 for short)
3. Where we have come from (our journey thus far) We will call this Starting point 1 (S1 for short)
S1 —————————— R1 ——————————————————————— F1
All pain comes from comparing yourself to F1 when you are standing at R1.
All pleasure comes from pursuing F1 but looking back from R1 to S1 and enjoying the journey and how far you’ve come. When you get this, it is a game changer.
When you’re chasing your goals and dreams you need to stop every once in a while to take stock of just how much progress you have made how far you have come, what you have learned what challenges and obstacles you have overcome. Just how much you have evolved and grown. Then and only then, can you be pleased with your progress and motivated to continue.
This then is the real secret to happiness!!!!
